How often have people tried to discern the difference between what are values, what is moral, and how to be ethical?

So here’s my take on this. Imagine a three-legged stool. All three legs to be solid and connected for the stool to be useful. So…………………………..

Imagine one leg is Values, another leg is Morals and the third leg is Ethics. Without all three solidly attached, the stool is useless.

Here’s a way to discern and appreciate the difference, and maybe why your ethics training may need to adapt.

First, let’s define each one:

Values = Deal with a person’s judgment of what’s important in life.

Morals = Deal with principles of what is acceptable and what is not, what is negotiable and what is not.

Ethics = Deal with what’s right or wrong behavior based on Values and Morals.

Therefore, a truly ethical decision cannot be made without the consideration of one’s values and morals. A stool is not a stool with only one or two legs! You must have all three legs to be functional, steadfast, and can be accounted for.

A person needs to reflect and figure out what one’s values are before something happens otherwise emotions may cloud the decisions. because it’s a personal experience. One needs to know that one is accountable for their behavior, but without the discipline, education, and application of moral thinking, moral reasoning, moral discipline, etc. one can easily make the wrong decision. Again two legs are not a stool!

Therefore, if one makes a decision based on one’s values and what their ethics training taught them, it could likely be the wrong decision or at least ineffective because the third leg of the stool is missing!

Are you functioning on a stool with three legs? If not, prepare for the fall and it won’t be pretty! Let’s look a little closer at some of these points.

Let me help you one step further. Here are six signs of a moral/values lapse

1.   When ego replaces insight

We have great examples of this problem, Politics, misuse of power, low self-esteem, etc.

2.   When what you do is inconsistent with what you preach

Remember, your people listen with their eyes, not their ears. What you do says so much more than what you say! Go slow and choose well.

3.   For what, do you compromise your values?

As a leader,  you need to think carefully about this as you owe an explanation as to “how” and why you came to this decision. If you don’t, you leave the reaction up to your people to interpret the “how” and “why” it was made.

4.   When you look for scapegoats rather than take responsibility

You’re the leader. The buck stops with you. Own it! Looking for scapegoats is a sign of moral weakness. You had the “guts” to make the decision, but now you don’t don’t want to pay the price for it. Morale filters down, it never filters up!

5.   When you don’t realize that moral awareness can only be proactive.

Being morally aware is a proactive choice. No one can make you or anyone else be moral or act morally. You, as a leader. Need to model the type of workplace you want, yourself, want to work in, for, and with your people. You lead by role modeling, not by dictation.

Let’s take this one step further:

           I have identified 6 characteristics of a morally minded leader.

1.  Accepts oneself and others as they are at any given moment.

This is not a right or wrong moment, but one of personal growth.

This means being at peace with who, what, and where you are in life. There is a sense of balance based on a belief system that all can experience.

2.  Experiences profound interpersonal relationships.

 Profound interpersonal relationships can only be based on shared values. Values would include trust, honesty, genuineness, consistency, other-centered, sensitivity, ethics, reliability, and dependability, etc. These relationships take work, time, patience, and commitment.

3. Accepts reality and reflectively changes where needed.

One has come to peace with the realization that virtue is not one isolated value, but a relationship between several values that need to be reflectively used to make and accept change in life that is based on purpose rather than just need.

4. Enjoys life and is creative.

This point reminds me of the ancient text that says:” Make us know the shortness of our lives so that we may gain wisdom of the heart.” It’s the attitude that every day and everyone in it, is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. The moral leader doesn’t miss it.

5. Demonstrates consistent behavior.

This consistency runs through every aspect of one’s life,i.e. personal, home, and work life. One is not one person at work and a different one at home. Values, by their very nature, are consistent. It’s the interpretation at times that is troubling.

6. Trust oneself and be open to growth.

To trust oneself is to know that life evolves and that evolution is an openness to change, grow, and adapt one’s values without altering them. The goal is to move from success to significance.